They asked when I planned to do theSRS. They were both aware of what was required. I answered that I hadnot yet planned a date but would let them know when I made arrangements.A Deadly CalmThat night I told Sandy what had transpired at work including mystatement that I was in transition. She was shocked. Wordlessly sherose and went to our bedroom. I remained seated, wondering....She returned later."So you decided to go ahead with this... this... without asking me.Without thinking of me. Without thinking of our marriage. How couldyou be so thoughtless?" I'm sorry, Sandy, it just seemed to happen. Month after month Ievolved I guess from what I was to what I am. It came to a head when mymanagement called me in and asked my intentions. I... just... told themthat I was in transition. Their response was so encouraging that I wasrelieved and also felt trapped by my own words." Well, you go right ahead and do your thing -- do your SRS -- we'll copesomehow. I love you. We'll. He was able to follow my examples, and successfully completed a couple exemplars from the workbook. He was all sunshine as we went to rehearsal, and he beamed at me as he was assigned a solo for one of the selections for lessons and carols. After rehearsal he came up again, with Simon Wilcox in tow. “Hey, Mickey,” he said, so familiarly. “Can you help me again Thursday, before rehearsal? That really helped.”“Let me see,” I said, pulling my calendar out of my pocket. “It looks okay. Same time, or a little earlier?”“Could you make it earlier—maybe a half hour?” “Yes, I think I can.” Roddy gave me another radiant smile, and ran off with Simon in tow, though Simon gave me a curious look, or was it a look of longing? As he went. I wondered what Roddy had told him. No knowing. Hopefully not that I was a great fuck. Our next session was equally successful, though this time it was me who had the most difficulty focusing. I could smell the sweet boy smell, the smell of musk and.
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