He ignored me and flipped back a couple more pages and began reading. I watched as tears filled his eyes. ‘Susie, I’m sorry!’ he sobbed. ‘I’m really sorry. I never realized. How could I be such a dope. How could I not think of what I was doing to you.’ I took the journal. He had been reading what I had written after I found out about him and the other woman. I read some of it. I had forgotten how upset I had been. My writing reflected it and was full of sorrow and anger, with invectives against Corey, the woman I didn’t know and the world in general. He looked at me. ‘Susie, I’ll never do that to you again. Believe me Susie, I won’t.’ I took him in my arms as he put his head into my lap, still sobbing, ‘I never realized what I was doing to you, I never realized,’ he moaned. ‘I promise not to do it again. You believe me don’t you?’ ‘Corey, I’ve already decided to forgive you and to trust you. That’s why I brought you here. I gave you my journals to read so you knew what I have been. .. finish."Another shock. Philip Towne was yet another jock who "got all the pretty girls," or so we thought. Now I was finding that most of these guys did not have one tenth the sexual experience I did, and around school I was a nobody. My whole worldview was changing, or would have been if I was not totally preoccupied watching those two beautiful women laying naked on the bed together, stroking each other and talking about sex."I know what you mean," Ann said. "Richard was like that. Now things are different." Your new guy? He's nice-looking, but he's just... " She seemed to be searching for a word, and I guess the word today would be "geek" or "zod," but back then it was probably "nerd." Though I was not really that socially unacceptable, I was just not a member of the elite that girls like Ann and Mattie generally confined themselves to. So she stalled when trying to find a word to categorize me. Ann did not."He's incredible, Mattie. He's the best thing that ever happened to me..
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