Her head popped back round the door.'And I'll try to keep the noise down. My, uh, friend got a little carried away.''So would I, Candice. Don't sweat it.' She poked her tongue out and disappeared again. I went to the window and looked out. One door closes, another opens. And Candice sure had a beautiful ass, and she sure walked with a spring in her step, just like that other one I usedta know.My senior year was kinda unfocused. Looking back now, I can see that breaking up with Judy had changed something, made me more careful maybe. If I kept the graph lines in synch the talent kicked in and I got what I wanted, but the way it happened sucked. Selfish is one thing, but callous is another. I didn't want to think about that, but it stayed in the back of my head. I guess I knew that I might hafta be real selfish again one day, but right now I didn't want anything much, so I let myself go some. Shit, that felt so good: no gym, just enough work to keep scoring B's: slackers' paradise. I. Well, we made out many times, and I had another datecoming up in a few nights !!I was interrupted by my dreams as my younger sister Ashanti came out andtwirled around in her school uniform, which was identical to mine. As weboth stood there in our white tights, blazers, and plaid skirts, our newmom heaped on praises, "Oooh, you girls look so' precious!!" Yeah mom," I said, "I actually really can't wait to start school." Ifhad been a white boy, I honestly would have been obviously mortifiedabout starting at a new school that was almost all black and where Ididn't know anybody. However, my boyfriend obviously went there, as didall my girlfriends from church and ballet class, as did my sister who wasadapting to all this even much better than I was. I was not nervous atall as far as fitting in.Still though, there was that lingering part of me that was still "Ryan"that was second-guessing and feeling like deep-down, he wanted to rebelagainst this change and passively-aggressive.
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