The Virgin Mary knowingly smiled down at me. I asked my questions, whispered my prayers, waiting silently for answers, the statues stood at their posts, mute. No secrets were revealed that day, or in the days that followed. I stood in the doorway to what was once her room, a gallon of paint in my grip. The sickly gray that had once adorned the walls was replaced stroke by stroke, the past disguised with latex. Blue, the brilliant blue of a future that had no meaning to me, the blue of my pain, the blue of my anger, I moved some furniture into the room, making it a study. A study for what? Evening light crept through the white plastic mini blinds, turning my brilliant blue in to the same sickly gray color that I had concealed. I was transformed back, this was her room again, and I thought that if I listened closely enough, I could hear her last gasps for air, a painful wheezing and rattling, the sounds that haunted my dreams every night. I took pills to sleep, each night the dreams. "Don't leave, I like you!" I pried Nancy loose, and set her on my lap. "I heard you saying you were going to run away, and I don't want you to go. You're my friend." She started to cry, and I held her. "Please, I need you." She suddenly pulled free "Besides, I've got all those new clothes arriving next Monday, and you don't want to go until you've tried them all on!" She was now bubbling with enthusiasm. "Okay, I promise I will be here to try on the clothes." She grabbed and kissed me, then jumped up and ran off. "God, is she strange." Robyn nodded. "She acts like a seven-year old, but is actually close to the same age as me. It's like she never grew up." I thought about what the others had said about her. And remembered how I reacted at seven when my father got sick and died. And I didn't have any friends back then either. I jumped up and ran for a bathroom. I was really pale when I came out. Dr. Willis was waiting for me. "Want to talk about it?" Word travels fast around here.".
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