But there was no bickering. Andy was asked to explain what this was about. He said he’d been asked to write a speech for the director of marketing and it had wowed the convention of the Consumer Protection Society. ‘Consumer Protection Society,’ someone said in a quavering voice. Everyone crowded Andy to congratulate him and his elevation was accepted. On Friday two weeks later, Paul went for a long weekend to New York City and on that same day Mrs Young called in sick. The following week when Paul dumped new assignments on the manager of the technical writing team and checked on work in progress, he chatted to each member of the tech-write team and left Andy till last. They chatted and Paul ended the interchange loudly when saying, ‘Oh Andy. You are due at the chairman’s office for lunch at 1:00. He wants help to compose an address to the International Food Processors’ Organization based in Rome.’ Paul walked off smiling while Andy dropped a pencil and turned to look under Miranda’s. But for me, more than I had dreamed of for many years. I would get my freedom back!What would I do with it? To be free — what a wonderful thought! But when I tried to enjoy it, tried to think of the future that lay ahead of me now, tried to envision all the possibilities that I would have once I was a free woman again, my imagination, as well as my rational mind, failed me. What would I really want to do, who would I really want to be? And what of this could I actually hope to achieve? And how? A ceaseless procession of unfocused images of future me's swirled before my eyes in the dark, until my head swirled with them, disoriented and confused.With an effort of will I stopped those racing thoughts. There would be time enough to think them slowly and carefully in the forthcoming months. To calm down I tried to masturbate, but it made the cut across my vulva hurt and even to start bleeding again, so I gave it up.Why did I feel so uneasy? Whatever my life would be, once I was free.
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