Noah:“Great…anxiety.” I am always anxious before school. And why? Because I have an anxiety disorder. It’s called social anxiety. My brother knows about my anxiety because we always talk about in family therapy. I can’t even explain it, nor do I want to. This feeling stays with me even when we reach school.I think everybody is judging me, even those who I don’ know. Why am I so ugly? Why is everyone better looking then me? Those thoughts are only a few of the million I have every day. My brother would run off ahead with no trace of anxiety at all. Lucky bastard. I walked into school and Daniel was at his locker. Daniel had a big nose; he was skinny and very extraverted. He was social. I was very jealous of him so I would alter my mind to think that he was just annoying.I walked to my locker and thought: “Is the way I’m standing weird and gay looking?” A key word…gay. I wasn’t sure of my sexuality. I had a girlfriend, we did nothing, she broke up with me. She gave this bullshit reason. I continue to dance my fingers in the moonlight over your chest and they pause over your heart. I can feel it fluttering in your chest and it quickens my own blood. The heat from the blood in your veins rush to your skin and your cheeks get rosey.You roll towards me making your nipples like beacons in the night. I move onto my knees shifting the sheet off of me. We are both naked in the moon and getting ready to make love. I straddle your gorgeous body and lean down to kiss your lips, and then your throat, and then that little spot behind your ear you like so much. Your hands clasp onto my sides roaming over my taut waist and firm buttocks. As I lean to kiss more of your neck and shoulders, our nipples touch ever so slightly and we both inhale deeply, the anticipation almost too much. I slink down your body trailing my fingers over your body as I move. Your own hands slide up my body as I move closer and closer to your belly button. The further down I move, the more of your skin I.
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