’A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, ‘I almost had an affair with another woman.’ The priest said, ‘What do you mean, almost?’ The Irishman said, ‘Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.’ The priest said, ‘Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box.’ The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ‘I saw that ... You didn’t put any money in the poor box!’ The Irishman replied, ‘Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that’s the same as putting it in!’Lemon Squeeze There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, ‘Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.’ The priest said, ‘Confess your sins and be. You have a really big one and you’re not even hurting my pussy ... You are so gentle and for a boy who has never fucked, you are so good with that big cock you have. Fuck me and tell me about Honey. I want to love her too...”“We pulled our clothes down and she held my dick, moving her hand like I do when I jack-off. She let me shoot my cum on her bandana when she spread it over her shorts. Then she let me pull her shorts down and leave her panties on. I put my hand inside her panties and let my fingers slip into her pussy just a little. I didn’t want to hurt her and she wanted me to wait and break her cherry with my cock. I found her clitty and made her cum so many times, she made me stop.“She sucked my cock and made me come in her mouth. Then I took her bandana and wet it in the creek. I washed my cock, then wet it again and went back up to where she was. She was still lying there with her legs spread wide and I pulled her panties down. She rolled over and I kissed her butt. I.
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