Then came that moment when our relationship changed utterly. The next day was Sunday, and, as usual, I went to church for Matins, in the coach along with the family, rather than along with the upper servants, as I had expected when I arrived. This courtesy, extended to me as a ‘gentleman’, was probably in recognition of my education rather than my birth. I found myself sitting alongside Miss Fox, and had the thrill of sharing my prayer-book with her. I sang out lustily, especially when my favourite Advent hymn O Come, O come Emanuel made an appearance in the morning service, rather than, as is more usual, at Evensong. I took Communion, and privately asked my Creator for forgiveness for my impure deeds and thoughts. I felt gratitude that this was the Church of England, and not the Church of Rome, and that I would not have to confess my sins to the pasty-looking, pop-eyed young curate who was casting admiring glances at my companion. I spent the remainder of the day at rest, as. ’ ‘Well, thanks,’ I said, squirming. ‘Why don’t you have coffee with me, so I convince you to say yes.’ I didn’t need convincing! I was quite taken with him, in all honesty. But I didn’t feel I could step on that carousel anymore without falling off and getting hurt. I tried to tell him that, but instead it came out sounding like, ‘Okay.’ Before you know it, I had agreed to meet him at the Barnes & Noble next door for a quick lunch. He walked away with a smile on my face, me with a frown on mine. As it turned out, we had a pleasant coffee. We liked a lot of the same things and that made for no more of those awkward silences. His eyes were all over my face and hands, and how I wanted them there! When it came time for me to go back to work he extracted a date from me the following Sunday. I wasn’t completely sure about it, but I said yes. I went back to work feeling elated, nervous, cautious, angry at myself for making what was most likely a stupid mistake. That night, I went home and.
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