That afternoon, I peeled off to go visit my relatives and met him later that night in the West Village at the Monster Bar. He was out with his flight attendant buddies and wanted them to meet me. These men, upon meeting me gave me the “fresh meat” look and told Fred “Nice job!” We drank together while Fred’s friends start singing showtunes as a guy across the bar played the piano. At the end of the night, Fred and I took a cab back to the hotel and have another evening fuckfest before falling asleep. The next day, I confessed to Fred that I wanted something more from him than just casual sex. “Ya, I kinda like you,” I said to him. “I like you too,” he responded. “I know that you don’t like to rush things, but I really want to see where things go between you and I,” I said as I began to stroke his hand. “Baby, you live so far away. Trying to build a relationship just may not work.” Fred said before kissing my hand. “It’s a risk I’m willing to take.” Don’t get me wrong. Fred was right. " The way what is?"I began to feel uneasy. She'd called me "Les." When I'm dressed and made up to look nice she always calls me "Leslie" or "darling girl," so I'll feel relaxed and reassured. But this was "Les." The name people called me at the office. My business identity. My male name. She hadn't used "Les" in a long time, several years, not since I'd agreed to live at home with her as a woman, not a man. To be a woman everywhere except my office."Les, I'm divorcing you. I've already started the proceedings. You'll get your formal notice in another day or two." What!!"She sat silent now. It was said. She watched my eyes, done up in that brand new baby-stare look. She knew how to look through them and read my real feelings. She also knew my "What!!" was filler, a stall for time while I felt for a suitable response. Of course I'd heard her.She also knew I knew that whenever she reached a point of decision, further argument was useless. That decisiveness was what made.
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