It’s about moving forward and changing your life and I don’t… I don’t want things to change from where they are.’ Anna raised an eyebrow and sat back in her chair. Elsie looked at her sharply. ‘What was that look?’ ‘That look? That one I keep specially for when people talk bollocks at me. You’ve never been skittish about marriage. In fact, you’re the biggest fan of marriage I’ve ever met. In fact, earlier in this conversation you were asking me whether I’d thought about proposing to Gemma.’ Anna took a long drag of her cigarette and smiled at her friend. ‘What’s the real reason?’ ‘That is the real reason!’ Elsie exclaimed indignantly. ‘There’s a big difference between being boyfriend-girlfriend and being husband and wife. Things change.’ She sighed and pulled an unruly lock of hair back behind her ear. ‘I guess I’m worried that maybe the fire will go away.’ Anna’s smile broadened. ‘You know what I think?’ ‘Generally your voice gives full commentary of your thoughts.’ ‘I think that. But, that was years ago. It was as though, it had never been. As far as Glory was concerned, she never had a breakdown. Funny, Amanda remembered it, remembered the lithium that made her hands shake, made her vomit ‘I like the luggage under your eyes,’ laughed Glory, inhaling a drag of her cigarette. Sometimes she wondered why she stayed friends with Amanda. She was like a child, a careless little girl who needed constant attention, that wasn’t Glory’s idea of a friendship. Then again, Amanda was there when Glory wasn’t so chic, when she had had her ‘breakdown.’ Amanda held that secret over her head, a secret that Amanda was going to use, but only in case of an emergency. That was it, that’s why Glory stayed friends with Amanda. Secrets had kept them together. Besides, nobody in Manhattan went to therapy. Mental illness was so uncool, a dark stigma that conjured up a series of ugly myths, myths about the mentally ill that needed to be abandoned, clarified. ‘I never talked to the.
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