Ironic, that’s how you’ve always been to me. I know you’d be smack dab in the middle of middle school now, thirteen. In my mind’s eye, you’d have your father’s beautiful looks: dark brown hair, stick straight and so shiny, eyes so dark brown the edges of the irises are purple, his length of bone, his fair skin with that gets unbelievably dark when kissed by the sun. I know that you would have had the heritage of his prodigious talent, so violin lessons would have been a must to start. Anything else would have been all you. I would have cheered you for tee ball or Kindermusik, gymnastics or karate, science fairs or spelling bees. You would never have come home to an empty house. You would never have wanted for any books or music. You would never have played second fiddle to anyone or anything. About Daddy. This is very complicated and I don’t understand so I don’t expect you to understand. He left us, but it wasn’t your fault. Since Mommy didn’t know for sure, she couldn’t tell him.. We have eaten in that comfortable quiet that seasoned lovers do, exchanging glances of passion that are barely hidden under the surface whilst we share the minutiae of our respective days. I delight in your telling of the long walks you took with Amy in the warmth of this spring day. As you laugh with delight at the recollection of her rolling playfully in the few remaining banks of snow, I smile as I enjoy the sound of your wonderful happiness. Every time I see or hear you as you take particular joy in our babe’s antics or sing a soft lullaby to lull her to sleep, I am filled with such warmth and pleasure that I feel that I could die right then a happy man. But I want to live for many more years to bask in your love and to spend those years trying to show you just how much I love and adore you. I often feel that I haven’t the words to convey these feelings to you. Since we first met online, we have been in each other’s minds and hearts, first through the exchange of increasing.
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