And then I wanted to but thought it was too risky. And then I despaired with myself. I had not taken a risk since my beloved wife had died. When was I going to let go? When was my evenings not going to be ready meal followed by classic comedy on satellite television and then an hour of reading historical fiction before bed. When was my door going to be locked from the outside in the evening, and not the inside? When was my security light going to trigger because I was walking down the path and not because of some kids loitering on the corner of the cul-de-sac? Tonight! It would be tonight.I shower and change into my smartest shirt, tie and suit with clean underwear and polished shoes. I have no idea why, but as I drag the razor across my hours-old stubble and open the new aftershave my wife got me as her last Christmas present, I feel more confident. I feel like I might be having an adventure and I am ready for it. I lock my door and walk briskly to the riverside apartments half a. Elena was a very attractive young woman. She has brown long hair, brown eyes and is about 5’6.” She's small chested and has a nice body. I’m 5’7” and have black curly hair and green eyes. My chest is much bigger then hers. But we both looked really great in our bikinis. I was wearing a white bikini with a cover up over it and Elena’s was wearing a yellow bikini with no cover up.“Do you want to watch television or go by the pool now? I figured we could watch some television first and after lunch we could go out by the pool.” “Okay, that sounds great." I followed Elena upstairs to her bedroom and she put on MTV and we sat on her bed. We were both leaning up against the pillows. Elena has a full size bed and it’s the kind that's pillow-topped and very soft. “I know this is going to sound weird, but do you like girls?” “I never really thought about it, Elena. I mean I’ve only ever been with guys.” “But, if you had the chance to be with a girl, would you?” “Like I said, I never really.
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