. "She began to cry, it was her and Ryan's song, an old song from the seventies."... The train is going, I see it in your eyes... the love, the pain, your tears... "She sobbed into her pillow."But I'll be lonely without you... I need your love to see me through... So please believe me, my heart is in your hands, and I'll be missing you... Babe, I love you... "She sat up, holding her pillow to her chest as she gulped for air."Because it's you babe, whenever I get lonely and I've had enough, feel like giving up... "She picked up the phone, choking back sobs.Ryan switched off the music. "I love you Jen. Why do I do this to you?" he whispered. "I love you, I'm sorry. Please forgive me, just this last time." Ryan, why? You think I'm a slut. I'm a fucking whore to you!" No, no! You're not! I don't, I don't think it at all. I didn't mean it. I don't know why I did that. I was just mad. Please, please know that. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it."She didn't answer him, crying and still angry, but. "Let me give you the quick tour and show you where you can put yourthings."Marcia led Phoebe through the downstairs, introducing the kitchen, theliving and dining rooms, all self-evident upon entering. She showed herthe first-floor bathroom and the back room where she and Walt hadhurriedly set up for a bedroom for Phoebe's use. The room consisted ofan old daybed that Walt had dragged out of storage and a couple ofhastily constructed but sturdy cardboard wardrobes they'd picked up fromTarget. A television stood on a stool in one corner. There was a jerry-rigged cable hook up in the room, also courtesy of Walt, hijacked fromMarcia's main account. The television was one of those combinationaffairs that also played DVD's. An air conditioner was fit in the biggerof the two small windows."I'm sorry things seems so provisional. We didn't have much time to getthings ready."Marcia felt a guilt similar to what she imagined a parent feels when agrown child returns home and finds his or her old.
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