I suspect it's something she doesn't want to talk about." We could have asked Dad, I suppose," Jon shrugged. "He probably knows. But when you get down to it, it's none of our business. We'll find out if she wants to tell us, I guess." It's probably nothing that matters to us, anyway," Tanisha agreed. "It's just, well, Jon, there's a little bit of my mind taking me where I don't want it to go. How things could have been, maybe should have been." You're seeing this big hole in my life -- hell, our lives -- getting filled in, and it makes you wish some, right?" That's a pretty good way of saying it," Tanisha agreed. She thought for a moment, then added, "On the other hand, it's wishing for what never was, too, so there's no point in making a big deal about it." Your family?" Jon said softly."Well, yeah," Tanisha said. "Except that my mother and father are both dead, and my brother probably doesn't have a brain tumor unless you call his whole brain a tumor. I don't think there's any. I'd have joshed them about it, but none of them looked like they were in the mood.When we camped that night, we saw Eve Simpson, Ellen, and Sally washing out their menfolks' clothes in the river. We didn't think it was wise to josh them either.Sam Stuart and Ellen came over later to talk for a spell. Sam wasn't saying much and was looking very thoughtful. Finally he came out with what was bothering him."Jase, Martha and me had a real good marriage. We fell in love when we were about your age. We got married and had three great kids."Ellen smiled and gave him a hug, then he went on. "Since Martha died, Ellen has been having to do all of the duties of keeping our wagon and cooking our meals. Becky Wilkes is in about the same shape we are. I don't think Abe did much except drive their wagon, but at least she had someone."I just waited without saying anything. I knew where he was going. Millie, Tess, and I had talked about it. I just wanted to see how he was going to get there."Becky and.
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