...... and he continued with his own mocking tirade about the dangers and “what ifs” of such behavior. She sat there with crossed arms drawing her lips together. It was a desperate attempt to keep from smiling but it was no good. Her cheeks raised despite her attempts and she finally busted out laughing. This was entirely new ground for them. It was a subject never ever before spoken about between them. Sex in generalities yes but as personal experiences, NO. After their mutual laughing had diminished they could finally be a bit more serious. They had their back and forth, reasonings, justifications, etc, etc. “Chris, Its different for me, I’ve been on birth control since I was 13” she explained. He shrugged his shoulders to indicate “so what”,“Thats was every girl I’ve been with said too”, he replied. “Oh, and you trusted in that” ?, she asked. “Well in fact NO, I didn’t trust in that THANK YOU ! God knows I wanted to”, he replied. “still want to”, he almost inaudibly whispered.. ’ ‘Well…’ he choked a little and coughed, ‘it’s ok.. we all have hard times… maybe when you’re on your feet better, you can…’ ‘No,’ she said. ‘Not maybe, not someday. I want to pay you back for all this, and I intend to pay as I go.’ ‘No no no,’ he protested, ‘you don’t have to pay me anything. I want to help you out. I –‘ ‘I know you do,’ she continued. ‘You’re a sweet guy. But I want to pay you. And what you really want… what you really need…. I don’t think it’s money. Is it?’ ‘Well…’ he said, not knowing how to answer her now. Christi leaned down and pulled his chair forward till his knees were almost touching the side of her new bed. In a single motion she dropped back onto the bed, raised her legs, and swept her loose sweatpants off. She was wearing simple red boyshorts under them. She leaned back against the heap of her pillows and lifted her feet, then set them on the armrests of his chair. She locked her yellow eyes on his blue ones and gazed at him. ‘If you really want me to.
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