We're in love."Mo nodded and handed me another plate. "I love you too, JR," she said, avoiding looking at me."Mo, I love you too. It's different than the way I love, Jackie, but I do love you." Then why won't you make love to me?"I felt Jackie against my back. Her arms went around my waist and her hands fondled my cock. "Yeah, why won't you make love to her?"Twisting away from Jackie, I tossed the dishtowel on the counter and ran outside. I jumped into the pool and began swimming laps. Pressing myself, I did the butterfly stroke while trying to clear my head. When I finally stopped to rest, I noticed my aunt sitting on the patio."You're doing very well with the butterfly, JR," my aunt said. She got up and came to the edge of the pool. Aunt Andrea pulled her dress up above her knees, sat down, and dangled her legs in the water. "What's up? You looked like you were upset when you came barreling across the patio." I'm confused—very confused," I said as I hoisted myself out of the pool. “I think you have always known that.” I have. Even now there are doubts hanging, lingering as if I had not put my entire existence into her happiness. Begrudged heart separated from how it all began. I slowly came to the realization that it was out of my hands. “I do love you.” I reiterated my stance. To be shunned and castrated from your life-love demanded more than just soft words and idle threats. Yet I still cling to inane attempts at saving face or dreams “I love you,”- how foolish that must sound to the strong and the bold. “I love you,”- yes goddamn you, I wish I had never spoken those words. I found myself smiling with embarrassment and humiliation. Yet I still dream- even now- there are no escapes from my prison. I am forced to move forward and never, ever look back. For my passions are not lighthearted in nature, neither are they lacking in enthusiasm. And for those of you that dismiss my endeavors with not so much as an acknowledgement, I say to you, we are of one body.
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