I had never had a sexual experience with a girl, and the thought never crossed my mind, that was until I started university. That was when the real problems started. * BANG BANG BANG Well that was the door, again, an angry landlord probably waiting at the other side most likely wanting the last two months’ rent. “For fuck sake Hattie, this is the last time I do you a favour. Pay the money and everything will go back to normal,” he barked through the keyhole. “Sorry Ken, I’ve been advised not to open the door as I’ve got the norovirus. It’s really infectious and I think I’m gonna … ” I stopped for emphasis as I mimicked gipping sounds as I pretended to throw up. I screwed up my eyes and breathed a silent sigh as I just realised how far I had sunk, just so he’d lay off about the rent. “I’m sick of your shit. Pay by Friday or get the fuck out,” he spat before I heard his heavy and repetitive footsteps walk away from my door and down the stairway. I was relieved, elated in fact.. He couldn’t let it. Cathryn pulled in the driveway at ten ’til five like she did every work day. Stopping at the end of the drive she hopped out to get the mail and waved absently to Miss Maybelle watering her flowers. ‘Cathryn, honey, wait a minute. I’ve got some brownies for you and Kent.’ Cathryn looked up to seen Maybelle’s ample girth moving towards her. ‘Here you go sweetie. How is that husband of yours?’ ‘He’s fine Miss Maybelle. Thanks for the brownies.’ Cathryn griped the plate in hopes that she could get back to her car and to the house before the twenty questions began. It was too late, Maybelle had the plate and Cathryn’s arm in her clutches and she wasn’t letting go without asking all her questions. ‘You know I saw the dear earlier today with that little cousin of his. He’s just adorable don’t you think?’ ‘Who is Miss Maybelle, Kent? Of course I think he’s cute I married him.’ ‘No sweetie, Sam. He’s just a hot little thing.’ Maybelle never quite learned the art of.
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