One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters,‘Was I getting in or out of the bath?’ The94-year-old yells back, ‘I don’t know. I’ll come up and see.’ She starts up the stairs and pauses‘Was I going up the stairs or down? The92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters, she shakes her head and says, ‘I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood... ‘She then yells, ‘I’ll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who’s at the door.’TELL ME THIS WON’T HAPPEN TO US!!!!‘I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!’Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, ‘Windy, isn’t it?’ ‘No, ‘ the second man replied,‘it’s Thursday.’ And the third man chimed in, ‘So am I. Let’s have a beer.’TELL ME THIS WON’T HAPPEN TO US!!!!A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and. Her pink eyes watched me with mild concern and she was wearing only a pair of shorts and a flowy barely concealing shirt. A pair of glorious white wings extended from her back.“Awawawa! I didn't manage to stop them! But you shouldn't have listened to the creepy voices in the dark in the first place! I can still make this right, I'm sure I can convince you to be a good person!” She said.I looked at her and scoffed to the best of my ability, I still didn’t have a body. Why would I refuse gifts of power and might, even if they came from dark gods?!“Don't scoff at me, I'm Ariel, the lion of heaven, Lord of Air! What?! Fuck You! I'm a Man! I like Girls!” said Ariel in exasperation.Okay look... I can switch your core and family to something better for free! Once you get your hands on the beauty of Light, you won't want to help those two perverts anymore! Not that you should have anyway!”Before me appeared a number of holograms again. The families seemed mostly lame, even if geared more.
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