I couldn't read her face or her body language no matter how hard I tried.After the longest minute of my life, she held out her arms and said, "Come here to me, let me hold you."I crawled over and cuddled in beside her with my head on her chest. She was warm and soft, with her unique smell I have always associated with love. I started crying, short little sobs that did little to calm the guilt I felt."Now tell me; what happened?"I started slowly, telling her about the incident in the showers, and after that I said something about wishing it had been someone else that touched me. From there, I confessed to having these feelings way back in sixth and seventh grade, usually for one of my teachers. I added to it by saying that last year I'd felt that way about strangers, people I'd seen in the mall or in a store. I told her about my perfect woman; older, taller than me and pretty, with some of the physical details I preferred.At the last, I told her — without being too gross — what Leshi. " Hesmiled at Tom. "You've been an exception." He blushed slightly, paused,then went on: "I've never had a conscious desire to be a woman, but I'vealways known that something....something wasn't quite right. For all thegood in my life, something fundamental in my life wasn't right. I neverfelt at home in this time...or in this body. I could never put my fingeron what the issue was...until now." Do you want to say goodbye to your parents...to the McDowells...before wego?" No, that would be too hard. I don't pretend to understand all of this,but if it works like I think it will, Justin will be erased fromexistence. It was like I--he--was never born. At least I hope so. They'rewonderful people, and they've been wonderful parents." Well then....let's get going."Without another word, they climbed into the car and headed toward thecity center. As he accelerated toward The Spot, he found himselfreaching out to Justin. He gripped his once and future spouse's handtightly as they headed back.
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