It was just last Friday, a week ago, when he and his two best buds had gone bar hopping to celebrate one of them getting engaged.“Aw, Com’ on, man!” Jesse was saying, “The Target Club ain’t that exclusive! They ain’t no cover charge – you ever hear of a strip club with no cover charge? Huh? An’ they got this hot girl, she does things with a knife that you just ain’t gonna believe, man!”So Henry, the designated driver, let himself be led into the club by his two drunken friends. He had to admit the place was pretty laid back for a strip joint. The customers were well behaved and the two bar girls were more than a little friendly, encouraging the customers with little hugs and getting a little too close when taking their orders. He was sure it increased their tip money. It occurred to him that they might be prostitutes, but as a police officer, he hadn’t heard of any vice activity around the Target Club. He had, though, heard rumors of a private sex club on the premises, but, so far,. That meant that everybody who bought this rag, (and those of us who stole it, ) would actually see what he'd done. And he didn't just propose. He wrote a poem. And it wasn't just any poem. It was a singularly bad poem. You'll never get to see it if I don't repeat it here. Not even Leno would use this stuff. But here it is, so you'll know why I laughed so loud that people came to see what was wrong.Chris, fair Chris, now hear me out,My heart is pining for ya.I am so blue, from needing you,The fairest Peach, in Georgia.Nothing means as much to me,As the bonny fair lass named ChrisI beg ye now, come make my day,And join me in wedded bliss.EvanAnd, if that wasn't enough, the guy basically included a self-addressed stamped envelope, except that this girl had to answer his proposal in kind ... in the paper ... for all the world to see.I read it again. There was a picture of a teddy bear, for pity's sake, and roses. Maybe Chris was a guy, and Evan was gay. No, that couldn't be. Gay marriage.
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