I'm ashamed to admit that, for just a millisecond, I thought aboutaccepting and seeing if jumping him would make me male again. His teethwere jagged and brown, he hadn't shaved for a couple of days and had asuggestion of poor personal hygiene about him. I wasn't that desperate -not yet anyway."I'd rather you didn't," I said frostily and found a small purse hangingfrom a fine strap across my shoulder."Lezza," he sneered as he slipped back into the crowd."What a knob," the barman said. I shrugged, like I was used to it.Inside the purse I found a wallet, a tiny heart shaped mirror, my roomkey, a lipstick and a condom. I paid for the drink quickly, hoping thebarman had not seen the contraceptive.The icy lager felt like bliss pouring down my throat. I closed my eyesfor a moment. Then I looked into the wallet. The driving licence had apicture of the female me with my hair tied back and it said my name wasBethany Rosalyn Hughes. My mum had been called Rosalyn.Somehow my bottle was empty. I. It wasn’t that I was unworthy of attention or unattractive but this was something that I was almost obstinately unaware of at 18. I was a tall slim girl of 5’6” with fine, shoulder length blonde hair, blue eyes and a runner’s physique. I’d a pretty face although I wasn’t close to being in the same league as the likes of Donna Simpson or Jessica Andrews. I found I could live with my breasts even if I did feel a little short changed at times and given how self-critical I was this amounted to high praise. My favourite feature was definitely my butt, I was pretty proud of it. If it hadn’t been for my painful lack of self confidence I would have been a happy girl. Gradually I became aware of the pregnant pause in Sophie’s monologue and that she was looking expectantly at me. I re-ran what I could remember of the conversation and blurted, “Four o’clock at yours would be fine”, hoping it was the right response. Seemingly it was and Sophie continued to prattle away happily at me. Katherine.
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