She handed me the joint and gingerly stepped down into the water.Our hot tub is small. It’s designed for two people or “three really good friends,” as I like to say … but sure enough, it’s crowded with three people. Three people displaces some water. Three people takes some effort. Three people requires some complicated intertangling of limbs and an awareness of where ones toes are situated.As my wife stepped down into the water and started trying to figure out how she was gonna settle and sit she did a little half-turn, and I noticed she’d put a plug up her ass – one of our larger ones too.“You put a plug in?” I said.She lowered herself down into the water and got herself settled, “Well … yeah.” She looked at me then at my friend, then back at me. “The Tantus ... the black one.”I looked at my friend. His face was flushed and it wasn’t just the hot water.“Well…” I didn’t know what to say. I felt awkward, at a loss for words.“We’re going to have sex afterwards … right?” My wife said,. Half the neighborhood kids come through here and it doesn't faze you one bit. Most of the kids think of you as a summer-time Santa. What's your secret?" That's easy, I love it! Besides, the prettiest ladies in the neighborhood come by to spend a sunny day with me."Laughing, she sat up and struck a model-like pose, "So you like what you see."Taking the opportunity for a long look, "I would be dead not to appreciate you."She fell back on the lounge, still laughing. "That's why all the ladies like you. You look, appreciate, without being gross or stupid. Some of the husbands still act like schoolboys." I bet you know that more than anyone." Maybe. I do think I've heard variations on 'My wife doesn't understand me' line more than I can count and quite a few 'my husband doesn't understand me' too. Especially after I divorced Frank." Oh I do remember the rumor central over that one. I was floored by some of the comments." Yes, for a while I think they were talking about me more than you.
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