‘After dinner, she asked if we could speak in private. I was happy, for I thought she was opening up to me a little bit. I could not have been more wrong. ‘We went into my study – this very study, and I sat down. I motioned her to sit, but she refused. I asked her what she wanted to talk about, and she looked hard at me with those green eyes, and she began. ‘She started in a normal tone of voice. She began asking me about her mother. Very quickly she began asking me why I hadn’t rescued her mother when she was pregnant. ‘She blamed me, Julian. She told me all her sorrows stemmed from me, and asked me how I could have had the temerity to think she could ever love me. She slowly grew angrier and more clipped as she paced the room. ‘She told me that in honor of her mother’s memory, she would try to stifle the hate she felt for me. Yes, she said hate. But she said she could never love me, nor even like me, and she certainly didn’t intend on remaining here. ‘She wanted to leave?’ Julian. It was Brenda that first made me realize this, because of the role she played in the life of our group. We all worked in the business, except for her. We all went to college, except for her. Still, in spite of that, the contributions she made by cooking for all of us, and by caring for the children, in our absence, made whatever we were doing that much more productive. Without actually being a part of the work or the studying, Brenda managed to be included, by her support of our activities, and by the confidence we had with her being in charge of caring for our precious children. We trusted Brenda, and she trusted us to take care of her, just like she took care of all of us.There needed to be a strong bond in order to make my brain trust idea work. In the final reckoning, what I sought was a synergistic relationship, one where each of us added more to the group than any of us had to offer by him or herself.So far, I really believed we had managed that with the group that had already.
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