” “Oh, it’s big all right. You’re gonna’ love the size of this one!” Johnny and I walked to the back lot where all the “vintage” cars were parked. In the rear of the lot sat a gold 1970-something Chrysler New Yorker with a peeling vinyl roof. It was nestled back in a corner like some sexy old queen accompanied by her court: a dinged-up red Chevy Impala and a rusty-white ‘83 Ford Fairlane. I felt right then… she might be the one. “Rich Corinthian leather… a spacious interior… a rear console that folds up for more room. What do you think, Lara? ‘Want to go for a ride?” “Sure, Johnny, I hope you’re coming with me…” “It’s my policy always to come with the beautiful ladies that I serve, Lara.” “We don’t really have to “go” anywhere, Johnny, I just want to get in the back seat and check out the size of this unit.”(I thought I would be clever and use the double-entendre thing.) “Lara, I believe you will see, it’s bigger inside than out.” (Johnny obviously got it.) “Exactly what I was hoping. Don’t give me any shit, just do it! Understand?”This time I felt his urgency and I took my mouth off of him and said. “Yes sir.”“Good, and that is how you address everyone. With ‘yes sir, or yes Sir Mr. Benson. Oh here’s another item. Almost everyone I introduce you to, I will only offer their first name, so like the man coming over is named Chuck you will not know his last name unless someone accidently says it. As far as you are concerned Chuck is his only name and you will address him as Mr. Chuck or Mr. Chuck sir. Got that?”When you’re not with me you’re free to do whatever you want. You can blow anyone you want except those people I introduce you to, but just know I want a full accounting of who you suck and what happened.I nodded.I’m sure there will be more rules that you need to know and I’ll fill you in on them as they come up. You’re doing a great job on my joint, it won’t be long before you’ll get your reward.My jaw was starting to get a little tired. It wasn’t used to.
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