I shared the dressing room with five other girls. We treated our work very professionally. We played a role and performed an illusion. I was surprised that out of our little group, only two of us lived full time as girls. Two others were married and two never said much about themselves. Those two were very flamboyant. Most of us called ourselves drag queens but they liked the term shemale. I thought that term would make me feel less real so I just didn't use it. I was an actress. The other girl who lived full time partnered with a male. I had no real idea of which I might relate to though I thought about it all the time. I anxiously needed to be validated as a girl and wanted whatever that meant. While I was very curious about being with a man, it was a little intimidating. Still, I had to admit to myself that I had crushes on the other performers. Naturally, we all did a little flirting and vamping with each other. We were an affectionate sorority.I knew who I was. I was a woman. I. Ami bollam,”Sumi arekta juke aro uporer dike dekhte pachchi.” She short er uporer dike hat dhukiye ota dhore tante laglo.Kintu ota beruchche na.Juketa tar gude ordhek dhuke geche.She voy peye khado khado golay bollo,”Bhaiya ota amar vitore dhuke jachche.” Ami nije dhore tanlam kinto,beruchche na.She ota dhore rekhe amake bollo,”Tumi amar pant khule felo.” Ami oke pajakulo kore niye boro gacher niche shuiye diye,pant khule oke nengto korlam.O shudhu chutto jama ta pore ache.She du pa choriye khede khede bollo,”Tumi amar gude angul dhukiye ota ber koro.Amar voy hochche.” Ami ekhate juke ta dhore onno hater torjoni or gude dhukiye onek koshrot kore o ota ber korte na pere bollam,”Tur futo ta khub chuto,tai ota beruchche na.” Sumi rag kore chukher pani fele bollo,”Tumi eto gadha keno?Tumar angul dhukiye futo ta boro kore nite paro na? Ma amake shatar dite mana koreche.Ekhon evabe bari gele amay marbe je!” Ami jore chap diye amar anguli kichuta govire dhukiye onek kosto kore juke ta ber.
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