I closed my condo door, and threw my keys onto the stand. It was at thatmoment that I realized that I was exhausted. I was practically fallingdown off my heels, I was so tired. Physically, yes, but emotionally too,the events of the last four hours had been so shattering, so outside ofany normal I'd ever had, that I had been drained of energy.I needed to sleep.I moved past my living room, my heels creating a dull thud in thecarpeting. In my peripheral vision I saw my little fake Christmas treeright where I'd left it, on top of the coffee table. I took two moresteps towards my bedroom before I stopped suddenly.Something wasn't right about that picture.I took two steps backwards, not always the easiest thing to do in four-inch heels. I got to the doorway, and leaned slightly to my right, justbarely peering into the living room.Which was full of presents.Boxes of every shape and size, wrapped in the most unique paper I'd everseen. Piles of boxes everywhere. Boxes on my couch. . ." I mean to think to myself but seemingly by mistake I speak it out loudly as my Eyes widen up you realize that this might not be the right thing to say to a suicidal person. He just chuckles and shruggs it off. I start moving towards him. "You look like shit that's been eaten by a dog and puked out into an even bigger pile of shit" he says, eyeing me up from head to toes. "Funny, a jumper talking to me about how my life sucks" I answer, although not meaning to say anything once again."Yes, I am going to jump and end my life, but it's not how you think. My life doesn't suck, it's quiet the opposite: My life is too perfect. For about 20 years I have lived THE life. A life everybody dreams of. But unfortunately, I have come to notice that I miscalculated. What I thought would bring happiness only made me lonely.What I seeked most, seems like a foolish dream nowadays. I am sick of this life I can't be sure of if it's mz own accomlishment or not. Idon't want to continue any longer, but.
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