They’re really good at coaching me on the proper way to make macaroni and cheese out of a box. After mac ’n’ cheese we watched Babes In Toyland, an old, old Christmas classic for about the fourth or fifth time before bedtime. I’ve never especially liked it, but the kids did and that was what was important. I had a text message from Addie that they’d arrived and were having a good day. Nothing about Nick.When I went to bed that night, I thought about what Addie might have done that evening with Nick and what they might be doing at that very moment. Then I had one of my rare intelligent thoughts: Playboy’s website. I know they have pictorials and I wondered about Tanya. I had to pay the subscription fee, then found the playmates and there she was: Playmate of the Month, December 2028. Tanya Fleming and dozens of pictures, videos and an interview with her.God, the photographer was good. I thought Robert’s pictures from that night in our house were good, but they were nothing like these.. Fuck 'em."Now Homer and me has been best friends since before we could walk. In fact, some smart assed preacher once called us "the first unattached Siamese twins in the world." But fuck that preacher, what did he know about friendship? I thought I knew just about everything about old Homer there was to know except about him fucking my sweet and virginally innocent Emily over all those years we were married before I caught them by accident. But right then, I realized that there was a part of Homer that ran deeper than I had ever realized. In fact, I discovered that Homer was deeper on the inside than he was on the outside. Now how's that for a thought?Let me tell you another thing that just might surprise you. I was getting tired of doing uppers and downers and booze and all that shit. Ever since our little Reo was born I been thinking. I decided that I didn't want our son to get all fucked up on all that shit I been taking all this time. And I decided that I had to be a role model.
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