The man I had talked to on the phone was behind a desk reading a book and greeted me in Italian. He immediately realised who I was, asked for my payment, explained to me a few rules that boiled down to respect everyone and no-means-no, had me sign a form and pointed me towards the next room.I pulled the curtain, stepped into the somehow seductive looking room. It was empty except for one person behind the bar,“Cosa stai bevendo, tesoro?”“I’m sorry, lo no parlo Italiano,” I replied with what I believed to be a fairly decent accent.“No worries, we get all sorts in here, what’s your poison?” She asked, gesturing towards the many bottles behind her.“Gin and tonic please,”Now, this may have been my imagination and stress level playing tricks on me, but I was unsure if this 'she' was, in fact, a 'he.' She had quite the low voice, long dark hair that could have been a wig, fake eyelashes, and a strong amount of make-up. In my doubt, I didn’t think to look for an Adam’s apple. She gave me my. “How do you work this thing, what button do I press?”Rolling my eyes I walked across and gave her a quick rundown on the basics of how the camera worked.“Tell you what, let’s take it off manual and put it on automatic. That way the camera will choose the best setting; all you have to do is press the button, hold whilst it autofocuses, and then push down again to take the photo. Simples.”“Okay smart arse, get back in position.”I heard the camera beep as it focused and then the shutter sound as she took the photo.Jade then started to move around taking photos in quick succession, “Yeah baby, yes, yes, NO, NO, over here, look at me, ignore me, moving around, oh baby, sexy.”I cracked up, “Okay, Austin give me the bloody camera back before you ask to see my mojo.”“You can show me your mojo anytime.”We took a few more photos before suggesting that Jade go and put on another outfit. Whilst Jade was getting changed I pulled out a small leather kilt and put it on along with a pair of high.
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