-Phyllis DillerAny time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.-Phyllis DillerWe spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.-Phyllis DillerBurt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.-Phyllis DillerWhat I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.-Phyllis DillerThe only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.-Phyllis DillerHis finest hour lasted a minute and a half.-Phyllis DillerOld age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.-Phyllis DillerMy photographs don't do me justice -they just look like me.-Phyllis DillerI admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.-Phyllis DillerTranquillizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children.-Phyllis DillerI asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?'. " My curiosity instantly kicked in, however Iwas puzzled when I opened it up and saw what looked like to rubberfemale breasts inside. "I don't get it mommy, why are you showing methis?" OK, so hear me out Taylor. As you continue to spend more time ingirl mode, at Mr. Roberts' house or at other times, my guess is thatyou'll have occasions that will call for wearing dresses, or a skirtand blouse combination. The dresses and blouses that you'll be tryingon are designed to accommodate a teenage girl's budding breasts, whichare almost fully developed by the time a girl reaches 16. So,unfortunately the dresses will simply not fit you right if you areflat-chested. I did a quick Google search last night, and found alocal store that caters to transgendered girls, and they helped me topick out a pair of breast forms that would be the right size for a 14-year old girl."Both my mom and Tiffany could see that I was freaking out, so Tiffanyjumped in and said "that was so smart of you, Mrs..
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