I said: ‘Come back soon. I have really enjoyed meeting you.’ She smiled and replied: ‘Likewise.’ They then went downstairs to collect their classwork and laptops. Joyce had bound their lab reports for them. As they walked down the office hall Yvonne took a good look at some of the photographs adorning the walls. She commented favorably about their beauty. Ann remarked that I was the photographer and that my studio was at the end of the hall. Ann showed it to her. Yvonne was very impressed. Ann later filled me in on their discussion on the ride back to campus. Yvonne said that she had never hugged a white guy before but if that is how white guys hug she wanted more. Ann said: ‘Matt’s hugs are something very unique. Let me ask you just what you felt was so special?’ Yvonne answered: ‘I don’t know how to describe it: connection, total acceptance, belonging, those all sort of point at what I was feeling, but not quite.’ Ann said: ‘Merging?’ Her friend said: ‘Yes. That’s it. For a. No, I'm not going to have an abortion. No, I don't expect you to visit the baby. Yes, I wish I'd never had sex with you. Yes, I regret the whole thing. Yes, I've thought about killing myself. Any other questions?"I shook my head slowly. In a few moments Vera had answered all the questions I had and a ton more that I would never have thought to ask. She enumerated each answer on her fingers and when she ran out of fingers Vera would start over."No," I said finally."Fine, now get out of here and leave me alone." Vera crossed her arms and started sulking.I walked away slowly. As I turned a corner I chanced to look back. Vera was crying. I knew she'd be pissed and humiliated if she knew I was watching so I just walked the rest of the way home. My arrogance was evaporating quickly. I'd impregnated one girl and put three others at risk including my mom and my sister. What I thought was power over women was just a display of immaturity and irresponsibility.I decided to just keep my mouth.
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