I walked in and we immediately started pulling our clothes off. You kept feeling between my legs and moaning about how wet I was. Eventually you stopped teasing me and pushed me up against a desk and started eating me out, I kept moaning loudly and pulling at your hair, trying to push your tongue deeper and you kept pushing my hands away and giving me that look that you occasionally give me to tell me to stop it and be patient. Then you kept putting your hand over my mouth trying to keep me quiet and even then I was being loud enough for other people to hear. We ended up moving to a supply closet so no one would hear me. You were pulling my hair and biting my neck and fucking me from behind. Eventually someone came in and I immediately scrambled to pull my clothes back on but you held your hand over my mouth and kept whispering in my ear about how good I felt and how I needed to be quiet so they couldn't hear. You were fucking me from behind and alternating between rubbing my clit. Jesus, that kind of makes it sound pathetic."Yeah, I agree, that sounds kind of extreme," my Rusky psychotherapist takes my silence as an answer. "Usually it takes people a lot to ... risk as much as you're risking. Personal tragedy, trauma ... they feel numb, so they want something intense and a little bit brutal to feel anything again. But maybe it's some kind of twisted search for meaning on your part. You see where I'm coming from? But maybe you're like a soldier, wanting to go back to Afghanistan because that's the only time you felt like you were someone, someone important, making a difference, living at the very edge, at your fullest." You're the weirdest psychologist I've ever been to," I tell the man. "What's the point of all this questioning, anyway?"Suddenly, the Russian straightens up and takes a long, deep gulp from his beer can. His facial expression changes. It doesn't become harder, or more evil or anything, just ... different. "Stand up," he gestures to me. "I want.
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