I heard people shouting pervert, murderer, terrorist. People were banging the side of what I guessed was a pick up and I was worried they might jump on and rip me apart. The truck picked up speed again and after about half an hour slowed again. This time when we stopped the noise from the gate indicated it was much more substantial and I guessed we had arrived at a prison. A second gate told me we were somewhere secure. My stretcher was unloaded from the truck and was pulled inside where more voices spoke. Someone then told me that a judge was on his way and I would be in court in 2 hours. He told me he was my defence and that I should not go into court with a hard cock. Still gagged I could not tell him this was a mistake or about the d**gs the air marshal had given me to make me hard!I was pulled along again and into another room. The hood was removed but this time the straps at my neck and forehead were replaced straight away. Photos were taken and there was lots more talking.. These Are Compliments of John ASome are dated but are still funny...1. My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.3. How to prepare Tofu:a. Throw it in the trashb. Grill some meat4. I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.5. I don’t mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours and 20 minutes.6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.7. Kids today don’t know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me.9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero out they closed school? Me neither.10. I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented. I forgot where I was.
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