Neither of us brought up the hose incident during dinner or the ride toand from the pizza place. We seemed to talk about everything but theincident.When the movie ended, my mother motioned for me to sit next to her onthe couch. I figured it was time for our talk."Jamie. I want you to know that I am not angry with you for what youwere wearing. But I am angry with you for sneaking items out of myroom. I understand why you didn't want to talk to me about this and Ihope you would have eventually brought it up."I sat with my eyes downcast, hoping that this would all end soon andwondering how long I would be grounded."Is there anything else you want to tell me?" No," I said, shaking my head."You're not gay are you?" No Mom!" Okay. I'm sorry. I had to ask."Some moments of awkward silence passed between us."Do you still want to wear nylons?" I'll stop mom. I promise I'll never wear them again." I didn't reallybelieve that and I'm pretty certain my mother didn't either. Even if Ireally wanted. And to Paul. And to Mr. Simms. And to Diana as well. But I'dnot argue with her for Ms. Cambrai knew I'd not found my strength asDiana. I wasn't fully certain I had yet to even now. I just feel soweak, emotionally, at times these days. Everything is going so well forme now and I know, in my heart of hearts, it's because I've let suchstrong people as Ms. Cambrai and Paul and Mr. Simms make those decisionsfor me. It is their strength which has buoyed me up and through all thestress of this past year and more. I like to tell myself I would've beenstrong enough not to have given in but I've been such a weak girl attimes I couldn't guarantee that I wouldn't have. Not even to myself.And now, here Ms. Cambrai said my "cleaning days" would be myresponsibility.She sensed my confusion and, as the wonderful teacher she is, answered myquestions before I could give voice to them myself."Diana, no my sweet, this doesn't mean I'll be 'supervising' yourcleanings or that they'll be at my.
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