. uh ... Cate's been terrified about you ... uh..." You mean she's nervous about my dying. You're allowed to say what we all know is going to happen," Alex told her."OK, Cate's nervous about you dying and she doesn't know how she'll handle it. She's been trying to prepare for it, and she wants to be sure she can handle it when it occurs, so she arranged this some time ago so she'd know how she'd cope without you. So she plans to wait as long as possible before returning. She's not so much giving us a chance as she's allowing us to distract you so you don't have to suffer what she's putting herself through." Wow. That's a lot to process. Shit. I guess we should have been discussing my death more, but frankly, the only way I can continue is to block it out of my mind. If I concentrate on my own death, on what it implies and what it'll be like and especially what it'll do to Cate and everyone else, I'm afraid I'll freeze up and be unable to continue with what I need to do. Frankly, I. .ooi je bell ar sabdo, shreya firlo..aaj kajer didi aseni tai amakei dorja khulte holo..’kire exam kemon holo,shreya?1st ki hote parbi?’ ‘ohh!! Mesho tumi na..aai sabe firlam,age amay aktu rest nite dao,ja cholllo aai kadin,pishi,pishi aktu jal dao na’..ami bollam ‘shreya aaj kajer didi aseni,tui ekai jol niye kha,tarpar ami toke garam jole chan koriye debo ‘.’thik achhe meso,’ tar por or school dress a chhara haye gele ami oke niye bathroom a alam..o shdhu akta kalo rong ar panti pore achhe..aar aai pratham dekhlam je or book duto alpo fule achhe..amar sharir kemon kare uthlo..,oke chhoto theke dekhleo aaj mone holo aar chhoto neyi ..shreya sona bachcha theke aste aste meye toyiry hochchhe..aah ki sundar lagchhe oke,echchha hole jariye dhare oke ador kari..’mesho ki holo aso..amar thanda lagchhe’..or dake hush fire elo…’hah, shreya aai to dekhto eii jole habe? Na arek tu garam barabo?”na,mesho thik achhe,atei habe”shreya aay na toke saban makhiye di’ aai bale or gaye age alpo garam.
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