It’s the ‘some reason’ I’ve got problems with. Really Colette, I’m at the end of my tether, I can’t go on like this in a silent house. She’s no more than a lodger. You’ve noticed we’ve not been out together for a while. I’m thinking we shouldn’t have got back together at all.”“Oh, Caleb, don’t say that! Give her a little longer. All I will say is that later in our talk, when we’d left the bedroom matter behind, she said she felt unsure that you really had forgiven her, or could really forgive her after what she’s done. She feels that there’s a reserve there.”“In me?”“I suppose so, but perhaps it’s really in her.”“There isn”t any reserve in me, Colette, and I have totally forgiven her. How do I get that through to her? I don’t think I can. It’s hopeless.”“I don’t know,” she answered. “How do you get her to believe you? Words don’t seem to be enough. She’s talking about going back to her therapist. It’s this guilt thing.”“Oh, yes,” she added. “And she said she feels like she’s got away. ’ I took a few steps back. Not that big of a deal? How was my four close male friends making a bet about which of the two newest guys could sleep with me not a big deal? I’d met Mark and Randy three years earlier, when I had started dating Zack. They were all part of a street racing team, something I had fallen hard in love with. Zack and I had the same kind car, a 300zxTT, how we met. The guys, Mark, Randy, Dane and Hector, had taken the idea of a girl racer, and loved it. None of them could get their girlfriends to even consider racing. Zack and I had dated, and raced together, for about a year and a half before he died in a wreck. That probably should have been my cue to bow out, but I did just the opposite. I salvaged everything I could from his car, and put it into mine, so, as I told the boys and Zack’s family, he and I would always be riding together. The crew had changed over the years I’d been in it, and all that was left of the old team was Mark, Randy and I. The three of.
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