"Alright, you have three main physical problems: hair, gonads and bodyshape. At the moment, with one of those, your gonads, you only have oneoption, hiding them!" Karen was grinning as she said this."Hair is split into three areas, body hair, that's legs, arms and chest,facial hair and that on your head. Body shape is also split into three,chest, hips and waist." She looked at me and asked. "How often do youshave?" Face, every day, at least; legs and chest, twice a week," I answered."Alright, you'll deal with body hair by using a combination of hairremoval creams, waxing and shaving. Don't worry, we all have hair on ourlegs and you'll simply adore waxing." She had seen my worried look."Facial hair is going to be a problem and I think the only answer iselectrolysis." Isn't that expensive?" I asked."It can be, I'll find out. That just leaves your crowning glory." You can be so bitchy sometimes," I joked. She knew I was partiallybald. "I'll just have to wear a wig all the time."Karen. Logically, of course, none of us believed in ghosts. We were too old for that. We'd all outgrown our ability to admit being afraid of the old house and had stayed away because of other concerns, the trespassing laws being just one of them mentioned every time one of us suggested visiting. It was Madison, who had just turned eighteen the week before, the youngest member of our little group, who suggested we spend Halloween night there. Our first line of defense and our primary objection, our legal concerns, were dispensed with. We had broken laws before, even gone into empty houses, and, as Madison pointed out, the chances of our being caught sneaking into Stonehaven, once we got past the wall that surrounded the grounds was less than at any house in town. We'd have true privacy. Finally Maria came up with a point that might have saved us by pointing out that the house was so old that it was certain to be filthy. There were certain to be cobwebs and spiders, and maybe even dead rats,.
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