Men who were,equally clearly, deeply unhappy and tortured by things beyond theirken. Men without purpose living in sad lost worlds where there is nolove. Is this because these pour souls could not give love when theywere lucky enough to find it? I do not know. Maybe they never found it.They were stories (I now realize) that never conveyed the true wonderof giving yourself to someone as I have. Well, let's not be too modest,I realized it then too. They weren't... complete. They made me sad, butI also realized that perhaps they made other people happy. Just not me.They lacked that ingredient which Mistress provides for us. She adoresme as I adore her. But, oh but! They showed me by little sentences hereand there, that where there is submissiveness, and where there isdominance, there does NOT have to be humiliation and cruelty for thesake of it. And now, here I am with the domina of my life and loved andtormented and jealous and with my stomach in knots and my heart beatinglike a drum. It was a comfortable place and there were lots of people there. Most of them were younger. We talked to lots of people for the first hour. I whispered to my husband, "How are we gonna get somebody". He said "All you've gotta do is talk to somebody who seems interested, and tell'em why we're here."I was pretty drunk. Otherwise I couldn't have done it. I talked to several men in the bar. The most friendly one was a 38 years old. He was an absolute sweetheart and seemed interested in me. I decided I just wasn't ready for the full-blown gang bang thing so I just said to him, "My husband and I came here to do a wild sex thing with someone. He'd really like to see me fuck someone, but I don't know if I'm comfortable enough. I'd love it if you'd come up to the room for a drink though, and I'm sure I could at least blow you, if your interested." He was naturally surprised and asked, "Are you sure he won't get weird or something?" "Absolutely not", I told him. "He will appreciate you coming.
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