We were able to move to a bigger house right away, albeit in a less desirable area. We even had a spare bedroom! We had also started talking about having more kids. As I explained, we both came from large Catholic families and, being a little isolated in London, both missed having so many relatives close by. Now that we could afford it without Claire working, having more was a financial possibility and we began to regret my vasectomy. I had started finding out about having it reversed but hadn’t gone ahead with it yet. However, not everything was running smoothly. We hadn’t bargained on just how much strain my new working arrangements would put on our relationship. The first and most obvious problem was of course that poor Claire had to bring up three kids on her own for more than half of the time. Their close ages and all the activities kids get up to when they go to school made this very hard work. She quickly became exhausted. The second, surprisingly important strain was. He moves his hands all over her. She surveys the night, nuzzling his neck, scratching her nose luxuriously on his whiskers, making soothing sounds over his poor hand. How will he explain the bite to his wife? She counts the tooth marks in dim, yellow light and kisses them one by one. She says: ‘My poor baby.’ She thinks: My dearest. We don’t know what he thinks. The night is so different from every other night. Where is she going? What is right and wrong? Will she wander a sexual wilderness? Will she be alone or will he lead her through it, her Moses? No, not Moses. He got me all the way to the promised land. She smiles at her wit. She is still sexually high. Or is it again? She can’t tell. She thinks: where is there a bed when you need one? She wants to pleasure him back, but he tells her that being almost caught once in a night is enough. He can’t mean it. Every time she leans between his legs she feels his hard penis pressed into her. Has he been hard all evening? That is.
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