“The real reason I broke things off with her is because I wanted the freedom to have sex with anyone I wanted and she wouldn’t let me do that. I took her virginity, stole it, in fact, under false pretenses. Ones I let her believe until I got what I wanted. And then, when she wanted to be exclusive, I simply threw her away like a used tissue. A girl who, all things being equal, loved me at least as much as anyone except maybe Kara. And whom I also loved.“I had a habit and a pattern of doing that, which lasted until Sunday. Oh sure, there were girls with whom I had sex where there was no pretense. But, there were others where there clearly WAS a pretense, and those are the girls I robbed of something I had no business taking from them. I thought, until Sunday, that it was theirs to give and do with what they want, but I’m a manipulative bastard and I tricked them into doing it.”Doctor Mercer put her pencil down on her desk and took off her glasses. She rubbed the bridge of her nose and. It was pleasant and easy, but hardly mind-blowing.Afterward, we talked. In college, sex had been the prelude to some of our deepest conversations. I suppose, in our own way, Dolores and I loved each other, but neither was what the other wanted in a spouse."So, Gary, am I as good as your ex?" Dolores had always asked these kinds of loaded questions, only from her, they weren't the trap they had been when my wife asked them. Still, one does answer such questions carefully."I've always been honest with you, Dolores," I replied, "and I hope that's still what you want."She smiled warmly and nodded."Well, my ex gave better blowjobs," I said, "but I think that was because she didn't much care for the rest of it. She never really had much interest in sex, so there were only a couple of positions allowed, and it was usually more like masturbating with her body than having a sex partner, so in that regard, you're much better."Dolores gave me that smile that let me know she understood both what.
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